Ask someone who's transgender anything!

That's ok. The transactivist movement wants those two words and identifications to be identical to people. Thus, if a person claims to be a "woman" internally, it is to be asserted then the person also is "female." Woman is a gender term that is about social perceptions. Female is the biological sex of a person as a biological fact.

Yet if you say someone is a "male woman" people will just look at you like you're nuts, though in my view that is what most true transgenders are who are of the biological sex of male but the psychological/social gender of a woman.

 

I'll try to answer it.
While having sex certainly is a large part of most romantic relationships and marriages, it is not the only factor and collectively may not be the decisive or most important factor. For example, it is not uncommon for older married couples to never have sex. Does that mean they have a failed relationship?
That is the theoretical question. IF you are single and uninvolved, and you met literally THE PERFECT person for you. Ideal in every way. Every attribute, every asset, every personality trait, every aspect is ideal - but the person is the wrong sex - could you work that out socially and sexually? Artificial means sexually? Or just literally impossible not just for you - but for everyone?

In addition, sexual drive tends to be extremely important and powerful in young people, but no so much over time in general. So it is not an impossibility that such could work. There can be other factors, such as children, involved for which the price of separating is just too great a price to pay and rather they might seek alternatives including an alternative definition and form of what marriage means to them.

There are other comparisons. What if due to disease or accident a man loses his genitals in a way not reparable. Marriage over? Relationship finished? If not, why not?

And there is the factor that unless a person has sex reassignment surgery, a change in sexual desires in regards to the other person's sex does not necessarily make the person impotent to the opposite sex. The lines are not as neatly divides as many like to claim they are.

I'm not advocating anything, but rather do not see it as an impossibility.

 

This tells me you've had limited contact with the trans world. I haven't. I've been amongst the trans folk since my teens, and I'm middle aged now. Trust me, western (white) males are rarely convincing as women - even they admit it. And FTM can be entirely convincing, especially after a few years on T. You would not know unless they disrobed - even then, some have had phalloplasty so you'd see a penis and testicles. They have deep voices, adam's apples, muscles, hairy chests, and beards.

 

This, 100%

I know for fact that many (gay and lesbian peep) feel their voices have been stolen. replaced by the LGBT behemoth - which demands to speak for all.

 

I don't deny that my experience of "the trans world" as you put it, has been quite limited. I have 2 trans woman friends & to my knowledge have never met a trans man (if I have they were not "out", at least not to me). I have seen several documentaries recently about trans men, because I wasn't able to find any before, when I was learning about trans women. And to be honest, the phalloplasty was not terribly convincing to me. It might have just been this particular person, but it didn't look real. All the other masculine attributes you have described I have seen in photos of clothed trans men & I agree they do look just like any other man.

I am also middle-aged (well I suppose that depends on your definition), & my friend Jaye started transitioning when I was 18. Personally, I think that Janet Mock, Zoe & Lavern Cox are all very beautiful women. The main giveaway I think, is that transitioning after going through puberty, they are all very tall, which is uncommon in women. But I am quite content to agree to disagree with you, on this subject.

 

cool. agree to disagree

I would add though, that even boys who transition prior to puberty (using puberty blockers HRT etc) STILL look like males. I am referring only to Caucasians though, as there are races who transition very well. South east Asians, in particular.

As regards men who date trans women ... I would suggest that they're quite rare. I've asked many younger straight males (both progressive and conservative) if it would bother them overmuch, and the universal response was gagging horror. I don't know why that is, and I'm not sure they do, but there you are. I guess straightness can be virtually absolute, so much so that even the mind and molecules of your own gender are unappealing.

I know that as a straight female, the very thing I like about males is their total difference. I like them to be as unlike me as possible. I'm small and skinny with scant body hair and pale skin. I like tall, hairy, muscular, deep voiced, bearded men with dark hair and darkish skin. The 'alien' is extremely fascinating to me. The female form, even when spectacularly attractive, seems so limp and dull sexually, that I can't even make myself think about it long enough to better describe its failure to fascinate ... my mind instantly 'slips off', as it were. I guess that's pretty straight

 

I have to say that I am surprised. I have met many guys who are a little un-comfortable with the idea, especially younger guys who want to have children. But I have rarely met anyone who acted with even mild revulsion, let alone "gagging horror" as you described it. Makes me wonder why the guys in your country are so different. We're a pretty liberal bunch here in Canada.

I have to admit I was surprised to read your description in your 3rd paragraph, for some reason something in your writing gave me the impression that you were a dude.
I'm short, with little body hair & very fair skin, but I am chubby. However, I have very different taste in men than you do, even though I am also totally straight. I can appreciate a beautiful woman, just as I can appreciate a painting without desiring to own it. I am generally not attracted to dark men, nor tall & hairy men. Although in the last couple of decades I've found myself widening my range of what I find attractive. It was only going into my 30s that I started dating men who are taller than me (I am 5'6"). I'd always found tall men to be physically repellent & intimidating. It took me along time to get past that little hang up. And I love men with long hair! I am so glad it is coming back into style here, it's so hot!

 

I concur.

We don't have the technology to turn a community organizer into a President and because you might think you are a President, it don't make you a competent President.

 

It was answered a long time ago. He is still considered a male according to science. He still have the parts of a male.

 

I think people with XXY are people with a chromosomal abnormality/mutation. That is a completely different thing than being a transgender person.

 

The 'gagging horror' was played up for laughs, it should be added. The upshot though, was that I've not yet found a male who was okay with dating a trans. The funny thing is, I live in a very liberal area of a liberal nation (probably more liberal than Canada). Maybe it's the men I mix with

I like my men as unlike me as possible. Tall, long hair, beard, deep voice, well built, strong hands, etc. I'm exceedingly shallow!

I too, can appreciate a beautiful woman. But sexually, women appear to me to be very limp and impotent ... if that makes sense. Far too soft and .... eww, nup. Can't even go there.

 

What lady Dr. are you talking about?

 

Of course, no problem! (Sorry for the long response Steam Sale is going on now)

So what makes the difference between the two? Well for me personally I see absolutely no difference. Do whatever you want to do with your body and explore exactly what it means to be human. As for others the idea goes to functionality. Someone who wants to chop their own limb off loses that limbs functionality. So that would be considered a mental disorder because that interferes with a person's ability to function.

 

I know, if I ever get the chance to what I want to do is visit the country with my friend who went to Thailand as an exchange student. Get the surgery and enjoy the country as well.

- - - Updated - - -

I'm curious, why do you think that it's only for looks?

 

Sorry, her name is Dr. Marcie Bowers & according to Wiki she has moved her practice from Trinidad CO, to San Mateo CA in December 2010. I saw a really interesting show on TV about her, years ago.

 

Oh ok, I'll have to look into her thanks!

 

If you have sex change surgery (let's say male to female, since that is your case), you lose the functionality of a working organ.

 

What functionality is lost?

 

Uh, all of it. Using a urinal, sexual insemination, you know, everything that a penis does. They aren't just there for looks, you know.

 

You can still pee if you have a sex change.

 

Penises do more than pee. And when they do pee, they are more effective at it, allowing one to go in more places, and faster. And they have less risk of all types of infection.

 

That's not what you said. You said lost functionality, not efficiency.

 

Resistance to infection is a function. Using a urinal (or a tree) is a function. Sexual insemination is a function.

And to relate it back to alien limb syndrome, if someone just thought that their foot was alien, and only cut that off but not their whole leg, they could still walk. It would just just be less "efficient". Does that somehow make it more sane than thinking that their entire leg is alien?

 

Again, functionality is not the same thing as efficiency. Unless you're going to make the claim that women can not go pee outdoors then your argument has no value. You're basically making the claim that because you bought a hatchet instead of food you lost functionality because you can't eat the hatchet. It is an absurd argument to make.

 

If someone just thought that their foot was alien, and only cut that off but not their whole leg, they could still walk. It would just just be less "efficient". Does that somehow make it more sane than thinking that their entire leg is alien? Also, I notice that you are ignoring every bit of functionality I mentioned other than urination.

It would be more akin to TRADING your food for a hatchet, in which case, you clearly DID lose functionality. You could have eaten...now you can't.