Smartie's Bar & Grill #63

They are the most prolific of Picnic pests.Find their way into nearly everyone's
kitchen sometime in the past,present and future
Don't exactly make for pets.Lest of which among themselves.

 

Hey all y'all. I can't wait for New Years. I need to tie one on.

Oy vey!

 

Can't help but notice that this post was made at 4:44am IN THE MORNING.

Two questions.
1. Where is you're paper route?

OR

2. Where did you go fishing?

 

[video=youtube;2H5uWRjFsGc]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2H5uWRjFsGc[/video]

 

Just stopped in for coffee before takin' off for work.

Three old guys are walking along a beach.

First old guy: "It's windy!"

Second old guy: "No it isn't. It's Thursday."

Third old guy: "Me too! Let's go have a beer."



Have a good one, folks.

 

Perk.....Coffee.

 

Greetings earthlings. Getting ready to kick off a nice long weekend by taking the afternoon off and visiting the Dallas Museum of Art. Will post later after I soak up some culture.

*burp*

 

Isn't that near Neiman Marcus.I heard tell they are having an after Christmas
Bah Humbug sale.Great deals on men's overcoats.I'm thinking cashmere.

 

However ... - On Thursday We Leave for Home -
Considered one of best if not The best of all the Hour long Twilight Zone.
Can anyone explain the gist of the storyline.
If it's not asking too mush.

 

I'd be smilin' for a week!

The missus would probably think I was losin' it.

 

It would be rare around here......not so much when I was out west coast.

 

Mornin People of the Strange Brews. End of the week......any coffee thoughts?

 

Well it's a really great story.Starring James Whitmore of - THEM - and also
- Shawshank Redemption -. It take place in some future year where a group
of humans are stranded on a distant planet.Seems their space ship landed
and they colonized and didn't like the new environment.They left Earth on
account of some Nuclear war and had to wait out the number of years on this
Other planet until it was safe to return to Earth.They eventually needed someone
to keep them together while on the Other planet.A leader of sorts.Someone to
instill needed discipline.Y'know like Michael Savage { hardy har har }.
So James Whitmore { Captain Benteen } takes charge and keeps them active
and alive { making sure they eat right and grow whatever they need etc. }
He kinda is bossy however.Demanding rigor.But also realizes that w/o that rigor
they surely would perish due to malnutrition and depression.He prided himself on
his ability to keep them in line and busy.Which is basically what our Military leaders
are charged with.
Then comes word one day that it's OK to leave and return to earth.The stars are in the right
alignment for a takeoff but the window for departure is approaching and won't be
available again for some time.
To be Continued

 

Word quickly spreads around the space colony at the prospect of
finally leaving this dreary planet which is too hot and sparse.The
humans being human are rejoicing and reminiscing over old times.
What it was like to watch or listen to a baseball game.Have hot dogs
and apple pie.Normal human needs.That can be taken for granted.
But when taken away or denied can seem like a prison term all it's
own.So the Humans are really jazzed about this departure and returing
to their beloved plant.Everyone it appears but Captain Benteen { Y'know
like Michael Savage }.
This creates a multifaced problem for the Iron-fisted Captain Benteen.
Slowly but surely the other humans disregard his pleas and constant
reminders what happened back on Earth and that it's not that bad way up
here on Planet Nowheresville.But the Humans are no longer tied at the
hip to Captain Benteen for guidance and advice for survival.It's a new
day and they finally have something to wish for and plan.Instead the
daily routine established by sourpuss Captain Benteen who seems to
think it's not all that bad on Planet Nowheresville.He is now taken up by
verbally knocking down all this cheeriness about Earth and the The good ol
days.Conjuring up argument after argument to knock down their new
fangled attitude about how good times are finally in reach.
Before long as their departure date is close at hand,the others are
now relegated to shunning Captain Benteen,until recently their leader
and provider.He is literally reduced to whistling to himself.No one cares
anymore what he thinks or how his routines are to be obeyed.
He is alone and holding on to the notion that he's right and they are
wrong.That it's a bad idea,almost a trick to think they can just up and
return to Earth, and no one the wiser.Because he's been they're
Wise Man all these years.He's kept them busy and alive.They need to
trust in him more now than ever.He says he not budging.He will stay.
That they'll see.How bad an idea to leave this place and chance Earth
after all these years.

Final chapter coming soon

 

As the due date for their arriving space ship is upon them and
all but Captain Benteen are tickled pink and very joyous of the prospect
of finally be able to leave this Prison Planet and return to their true roots,
Captain Benteen is seen moping around.He hangs around their meeting place
which was a cave that they used for shelter from the overbearing sun { this Planet
was closer to the Sun than Earth } and starts talking to himself { Y'know like
Michael Savage }.But since this Planet no matter how sparse and unearthlike
probably wouldn't dare have someone like a Michael Savage,even as guest.
Nevertheless Captain Benteen accepted it as his home and was reluctant to
participate in the banter like the others as to how thrilled they finally were.
You see ... this was entirely psychological.Captain Benteen accepted this dreary
planet with it's near inhabitable terrain and climate,primarily due to the fact he
was allowed to be their leader.That is what inspired and drove him.The fact that in
his mind the entire colony relied on his guidance and rigor of task mastering.
{ Y'know like Michael Savage tells his listeners every 5 minutes or so }.
Captain Benteen was now thoroughly lost.He had no reason to exist.
His leadership skills and task mastering would no longer be required.
Plus,the group didn't much care for him and his attitude to begin with.
Like I say ... he was Bossy.Sometimes Very Bossy.
As the day arrived and the Space ship made it's descent,and the
entire colony was packed and ready to leave,Captain Benteen waited in
hiding ...back at the meeting place { their Cave }.He no longer seemed positive
and strong willed with a duty to perform { looking after the well-being of the
group }. He was a different man.He was trying desperately to hold on to some
vestige of self-respect and dignity.But it was getting harder by the minute.He could
hear the Space ship land and the ruckus as the group formed a line and proceeded
to enter the ship in orderly fashion.Benteen { no longer a Captain } knew there was
still time to change his mind.But it meant that he would have to be like all the others
and wait his turn in line and take orders as to what he could take along.Benteen was
used to giving the orders.Not taking them.As his thinking process was still deciding
yet acting in defiance,he heard the sound.The Space ship departing.It was too late.
Now the entire planet was his to command as he thought fit.It took no time at all
for Benteen to feel alone.In fact,as fast as a jack rabbit As he Cried out to Wait ...
Wait I want to go.He Missed Earth as much or more than the others but couldn't
bring himself to admit in front of the others.Starting to recall all the great things about
earth that he missed so badly.But it was too late.His pride got the best of him.
He would now be condemned to spend the rest of his life on this Prison
Planet of his own making ... With the Sin of Pride as his companion ...
In the Twilight Zone

 

Coffee Time is anytime.



So where them girls at?

[video=youtube;p4kVWCSzfK4]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4kVWCSzfK4[/video]

 

I really don't tink Captain Benteen is looking forward to Coffee.
More like a case of Bourbon and Bucket filled with Ice.Oh and some
snacks.

 

Tell him I said, try the maple bacon whiskey coffee. It will put hair on his chest.

 

Brandy is better.Cognac is Best.With a little dollop of Vanilla Haagen-Dazs.
I don't dicker around when it comes to taste buds and such.

 

As long as there is no sugar and no cream.

[video=youtube;iIetdgLssP8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iIetdgLssP8[/video]

 

Maple, bacon, whiskey, and coffee ... all goin' down at once?

I'll tell you what, that sounds like a recipe for somethin', and it ain't hair on the chest.

I read that and looked at the picture, and I coulda swore I heard my guts screamin' ...

Nooooooooooo!

 

INXS calls it Elegantly Wasted.


I should have checked to see if that video would come up. This one will work.

[video=youtube;-WfQN_M1pQc]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-WfQN_M1pQc[/video]

 

Irish Whisky is like Tequila.It's really no big deal.In fact,even Canadian
Whisky is more flavorfull.
If one can't afford to get into Cognac or Good Scotch,yes,there's always
Irish Whisky.The Irish really don't know Booze.Yes,they shore know how to
Guzzle it.But not make it.The Irish ain't cooks either.
Great Poets and Cops and brick layers,dough.